***Guest Appearance
Credits to:
https://www.youtube.com/@therealestatejam6159
“Episode 207: How to Raise Private Money w/ Jay Conner”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QE1NqIsAgpY
If you’ve ever wondered how seasoned real estate investors scale their businesses, survive economic downturns, or manage to snap up deals other investors miss out on, the answer is often simpler (and more within your grasp) than you might think: private money.
In this episode of the Raising Private Money podcast, Jay Conner, the Private Money Authority, recently joined JD and Melissa invited and shared his journey and blueprint for raising and leveraging private funds for real estate investing.
The Journey from Traditional Lending to Private Money
Jay’s story began just like many aspiring investors: relying on traditional banks to fund his real estate deals. For the first six years, banks defined all the rules—from interest rates to the types of projects they could undertake. However, everything changed in January 2009, when Jay’s banker abruptly shut down his line of credit in the midst of a global financial crisis. With deals under contract and profits on the line, Jay faced a challenge: how can you continue investing without the backing of traditional lenders?
The turning point came when Jay reached out to a friend who introduced him to the concept of private money—raising capital directly from individuals who are looking for secured, high-return investments, often leveraging self-directed IRAs. Within just 90 days, Jay raised over $2 million, tripling his business and freeing himself from the constraints of traditional financing forever.
The Mindset Shift: From Begging for Money to Offering Opportunity
One of Jay’s core messages is the importance of approaching private money with the right mindset. “You’re not asking for money or begging for favors. You’re providing an opportunity for people to put their money to work, with great returns and security.” In the podcast, Jay explains that desperation has a smell. Instead of asking for a favor, you educate potential private lenders about your program, show them how it benefits them, and let them make the choice. This “teacher hat” approach shifts the conversation from a sales pitch to a value proposition.
Jay outlines a simple “great news” script: when you have a deal and a lender ready, you simply inform them you can now put their money to work, outline the property and terms, and provide wiring instructions. The key is separation—teach the private lending program first, get them interested, and only later present the specific deal. This builds anticipation and trust, ensuring both parties are aligned.
Who Can Be a Private Lender?
A common misconception among new investors is that you need wealthy, well-connected friends or family. Jay disagrees: your future lenders are everywhere—your social circles, business groups, and even acquaintances of acquaintances. He encourages investors to make a list of everyone they know, and then expand through business networking organizations such as BNI (Business Networking International) or real estate meetup groups. Additionally, existing private lenders (who often frequent self-directed IRA companies’ networking events) are looking for new investment opportunities.
Securing Win-Win Deals
Trust and security are the bedrock of private money. Jay emphasizes the importance of always securing your loans with real estate (never unsecured), naming lenders on insurance and title policies, and never borrowing more than 75% of the after-repaired value (ARV). If something goes wrong, the lender’s money is protected by the property’s value, not just the borrower’s promise.
Communication and integrity are vital. If a project faces issues, keeping lenders informed and working transparently builds lasting relationships. And no matter how experienced you are, Jay advocates ongoing education and mentorship to avoid costly mistakes and boost your confidence.
Getting Started Today
Jay’s final advice is simple: Start building relationships before you need the money. Don’t wait for the perfect deal—cultivate your private money network now so you’re always ready to move quickly when opportunity knocks.
Interested in learning more? Jay offers his book, “Where to Get the Money Now,” and free tickets to his private money conference, loaded with actionable tips to supercharge your real estate journey. Whether you’re brand new or a seasoned pro, private money could be the missing piece to unlocking your next level.
Ready to take charge of your real estate investing? Begin by reimagining your network, focusing on service, and never underestimating the power of private money. Your next deal—and your future—may depend on it.
10 Discussion Questions from this Episode:
- Jay Conner described experiencing a “global financial crisis” when his bank suddenly cut off his line of credit in 2009. How did this challenge shape his approach to funding deals afterward?
- How does Jay’s “teacher hat” approach to raising private money differ from traditional fundraising or loan requests, and why does he think it’s so successful?
- Jay emphasizes never borrowing or lending unsecured funds, even with family. Why do you think this principle is so critical in real estate investing?
- Jay discussed three main categories for finding private lenders: your own network, expanded networks (like BNI), and existing private lenders. Which of these seems most accessible for new investors, and why?
- In the episode, JD and Melissa bring up the fear and mindset challenges of asking for private money, especially for new investors. What advice or mindset shifts did Jay suggest to overcome these challenges?
- Jay mentioned that the worst time to raise private money is when you need it. How does building relationships with private lenders ahead of time create advantages for investors?
- There was a discussion around the dangers of ‘Ponzi scheme’ behavior in private lending. What due diligence steps should both borrowers and lenders take to protect themselves?
- Jay’s process for securing funds includes detailed communication and legal safeguards (like deeds of trust and insurance). How can clear communication between borrower and lender help prevent misunderstandings or problems down the line?
- How does Jay’s philosophy of leading ‘with a servant’s heart’ impact his approach to real estate deals and relationships with lenders?
- What are some practical steps for growing your network of potential private lenders, according to Jay, and how might you apply these strategies in your investing journey?
Fun facts that were revealed in the episode:
- Jay Conner Didn’t Start with Private Money—He Discovered It by Accident!
Jay spent his first six years in real estate relying on traditional banks, not even knowing private money was an option. It wasn’t until 2009, after his bank suddenly cut off his line of credit, that he stumbled into the world of private money, which ended up tripling his business in just 90 days! - You Don’t Need to Know Millionaires to Raise Private Money
Jay insists that your future private lenders aren’t only rich tycoons or family members with deep pockets. Most of his 47 private lenders are regular folks he met through local networking groups, church, Facebook, or friends-of-friends—proving that opportunity is all around you if you know where to look! - Jay Never “Asks” People for Money—He Makes Them Wait for the “Great News” Call
One of Jay’s signature moves is to teach potential lenders about the process before ever bringing them a deal. Once they’re ready, he gives them an exciting “great news” call to let them know he can put their money to work, meaning people are waiting by the phone, eager for the opportunity to become his lender!
Timestamps:
00:01 Raising Private Money Without Asking For It
03:14 Small-Town Real Estate Success
07:13 Private Lending Program Insights
10:41 Real Estate Investment Opportunity
16:20 Finding Private Lenders: Tips
18:05 Self-Directed IRA Networking Events
22:45 Securing Funding for Real Estate
24:41 Leverage Mentors for Business Success
26:52 Private Lending: Avoiding Ponzi Schemes
29:56 Lesson Learned: Secure Your Funds
34:40 Free Tickets and Book Offer
Private Money Academy Conference:
Free Report:
https://www.jayconner.com/MoneyReport
Join the Private Money Academy:
https://www.JayConner.com/trial/
Have you read Jay’s new book, Where to Get the Money Now?
It is available FREE (all you pay is the shipping and handling) at
https://www.JayConner.com/Book
What is Private Money? Real Estate Investing with Jay Conner
https://www.JayConner.com/MoneyPodcast
Jay Conner is a proven real estate investment leader. He maximizes creative methods to buy and sell properties with profits averaging $67,000 per deal without using his money or credit.
What is Real Estate Investing? Live Private Money Academy Conference
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https://www.youtube.com/c/RealEstateInvestingWithJayConner
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https://www.facebook.com/jay.conner.marketing
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